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Most Common Dating Mistakes

pardon service
by SS&SS

Article by Alana Beyer

Everyone has made a mistake on a date.  We have all walked away from a first date thinking “Why did I say that,” or “Why did I do that?” It is really common for a single to get so caught up in the thought of the date, that they lose perspective. Remember it is just a date. It is just an opportunity to get to know another person. And that is exactly what you should be doing—getting to know the other person better. Then after you get to know a little about the person, decide whether or not you want to see them a second time.

By knowing what the most common dating mistakes are and avoiding committing them, you’ll be on your way to a successful first date getting to know another single.

Most Common Dating Mistakes:

Judging Your Date

Picture this. You’re sitting at the table waiting for your date to arrive. He or she comes in, walks up to the table and says, “Hi.” Do you respond by saying, a) “Pardon, you must have the wrong person,” then grab your coat and leave or, b) “Take a seat, I’ve been looking forward to meeting you?” Tell the truth! Many people make the mistake of immediately judging their dates negatively and don’t even give them a chance.

If you catch yourself stacking up hurdles in front of your potential love matches, chances are none of them will make it to the finish line.

Unrealistic Expectations

This one happens a lot. We get so excited about the fantasy of our date that we start imagining all sorts of unrealistic ideals. By the time we get there we’re expecting to have lunch with George Clooney or Angelina Jolie. No wonder it’s a letdown!

Get rid of all your expectations on a first date. This is not the time to decide whether or not he or she meets your

criteria for everlasting love. It’s just a date!

Not Paying Attention

So by now we know that the most important part of a first date is to get to know the other person a little better, right? Well, you’d think so. But what often happens is that we spend too much time in our own head preoccupied with our own thoughts about what our date thinks about us. If you’re wondering whether or not you are doing the

right thing, if you look good in that light, or if she can see your bald spot, you’re going to miss out on the actual date.

If your mind isn’t focused on your date, how can your date get a sense of who you really are? And how will you know anything about him or her when you’ve spent most of the date worrying about yourself? It’s impossible to know for sure if your date likes you or not (unless they tell you), so give it up!

Not Listening and Talking Too Much

These two usually go hand in hand. It’s really important to be able to listen to the other person, and that doesn’t just

mean letting them speak, but also not trying to figure out what you’re going to say while they’re speaking. There’s

no way you can listen and think of a smart response at the same time.

Rambling on or talking “at” someone kills the experience of communication and alienates people. It’s a big turnoff. Your aim is to learn about your date; so ask questions, listen and let them do roughly 50 percent of the talking.

In a recent survey by dating service It’s Just Lunch, the company found the most common dating mistakes according to singles:

* 35% Judging your date…”don’t judge a bookby its cover.”

* 27% Having too high expectations for the date

* 25% Spilling your “history” and being too honest

* 13% Talking too much

For more information about It’s Just Lunch or to purchase the It’s Just Lunch Guide to Dating in Minneapolis.

About the Author

Alana is a VP of Its just Lunch based in San Diego.

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